wires and tubes

I sat by my father's bedside for 4 hours tonight. We didn't say much. He can't.
We never have; his cancer surgery furthers that scenario.

Tonight, I heard my dad laugh, saw him smile, for the first time since his operation. He laughed easily, as if he were just looking for even the slightest reason to laugh and cling onto some of those much needed endorphins. Most people are more reluctant to laugh; he seemed to need it.

Sitting in a chair, a dozen wires & tubes connected to his body, bound to this small room, silenced and hungry...

My dad broke down and cried.








My head may just explode.

Christmas Revelation

New revelation given at Temple Square: baby Jesus born stranded in the middle of some freakin' pond - not in a manger as previously thought.

And it must follow...

”This above all: to thine ownself be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.”
-Shakespeare-Hamlet

During the past several months, I have had experiences that have forced me to look deeply at my own motivations for things. It never ceases to amaze me how much pressure there is on each of us to comply with the will of some other person or group of people. We did not evolve as solitary animals; we are social creatures, courtesy of hundreds of thousands of years of natural selection. None of us should feel bad upon realizing how much we are susceptible to the opinions of others; let us each become aware of this tendency so that we may transcend mere humanity and become something more grand - our true selves. Only when we have learned to be honest with ourselves, can we ever share truth with others.